Saturday 31 December 2016

6 commandments of 2016


Right, no surprises how this is going to start because 2016 has been a bit of a funny one hasn't it? There's been icons cruelly taken from us, people less than admirable voted into positions of power, and Sean Paul was Christmas no.1

I was talking to someone about this shambles of a year, and they said 'but I think you, personally, have had a pretty good year. Has it been a good year with shit bits, or a shit year with good bits?' I've thought about this, over and over again, and I truly don't know.
This year, generally and personally, has been so turbulent with more ups and downs than Tigger on speed.
But there have been some consistencies that have stuck throughout these 365 days, and me and my life are all the richer for it.

So I present to you, the 6 commandments that got me through 2016...

1.) Thou shall bawl my eyes out
A lot of shit went down and a lot of people said goodbye that affected me more than I ever expected it too. I was down and disappointed about Brexit. I was sad and couldn’t stop listening to Purple Rain on repeat. And I felt silly about how it had made me feel, how emotional I got about it…but I really shouldn’t have.
 These people broke boundaries of social perception, they were brave, they were outspoken, they were hilarious, they bought joy into people’s life and they made others feel less alone. And for these personalities to stop existing anymore, well yeah, hell it’s upsetting.
It's been more emotionally harrowing this year than any other. From feeling part of my national identity was no more, to trying to put aside my emotional feelings to deal with practicalities through heartbreaking personal times.
Sadness is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign that you care. So put on your homegirl Adele and sob your little heart out because at the end of the day, it’ll feel so much better when you say hello on the other side. 

2.) Thou shall not let bitches kill my vibe
Look, we’ve each got our own shit to deal. I get it. But you taking out your drama on me, is not ok hun. Here I was just here chilling, until you bloody rained on my parade. Making me feel shit so you feel better is just not on. It’s like i’m just skipping along in life with my ballon, and you come over and pop it, like…what the fuck?

3.) Thou shall learn to do fuck all
I’m not very good at not doing much. On the rare weekend I don’t have plans and I plan to just be a couch potato and watch everything on the weekend, more often than not, I fail. UNTIL NOW.
I don't know it's down to my career being more demanding, my social life being busier, or feeling more emotional draining than ever, but this year I’m really mastered the art of doing squat all.
Even when I go away, usually I fill it to the brim with activities and trips to every monument and sight going (I love me a pretty cathedral) but this summer when I went to Ibiza, I did not much else than have walks in the sun, read on the beach, dance the night away and talk the world to rights over sangria and tapas.
Sometimes you really need to make plans to have no plans just to reset and recalibrate. Take time out to look after yourself y'all.

4) Thou shall not shut up about feminism
And I’m not going to step until men and women have equality rights, in all aspects. End of. 
If you need me, you can usually find me banging on about why we’re still not quite there yet (while on my 4th pint at the pub), retweeting all things Caitlin Moran or spontaneously shouting ‘yasss!’ on the train while reading Amy Poehler. 

5.) Thou shall stand up for one's self.
I hate confrontation and because of there, more often than not I’ll just take myself away from the situation and sit on the sidelines with a gin & tonic and stroking a puppy until it all blows over.
But sadly, my reluctancy for drama and desire for harmony gets taken advantage of, and that’s really not on boo.
So, I told myself to be brave, speak my mind, share my thoughts, be fair and not be aggressive about it.
Whether it’s someone I thought was a friend or someone who’s feelings for me made have hopes of a future together - I’m not there for you to walk over, talk down to, and believe me babes, you haven’t got my feelings sussed out (as much as you’d like to think you have).
Not here to cause a scene but I might be stronger than you think I am and I’m not going to let you make me feel otherwise. 

6. Thou shall fight back
Against inequality and injustice. Whether that be race, gender equality, social class, LGBTQ+ rights or poverty. Unfortunately, life isn’t fair - wouldn't it be swell if it was?
Good people get dealt bad hands and so-called bad people get fucking sweet deals. That’s just how things are sometimes sadly.

But the worst thing to do is sit back and just take it as it is.
Instead, speak out, get involved - fight the hell back.
And if anyone’s taught me how to fight back like a boss this year, is my mum.
After getting diagnosed and having surgery complications, she never gave up. And never will I again about anything or anyone I care or feel passionate about. 

2016. You’ve been a right doozy, but I’m a strong believer than that things happen for a reason. Yes we’ve cried some tears and might have been knocked back, but I’m a tougher, more informed, passionate person who gave a real fuck, because of it. So cheers for that...I guess?

2017, please be kinder and bring more hope.

Until next time...
A.x

Friday 9 December 2016

November stars & sparkles

Life and attempting to be an adult can be hella confusing, and that sometimes leads you to some mixed up outfit choices, like the t-shirt of a troubled teen, teamed with a hat that makes you look like a youth and a glitzy you wore to your graduation.
If Step Up ever did a collaboration with Pretty Woman (just sayin')

But then other times, it just makes sense to team sparkle, with sparkle.
An outfit can sometimes be too sparkly though...SAID NO-ONE EVER.

And if some sparkle isn't enough to glitz up your day-to-day dressing then it's about time to add some actual magic to it with the moon and the stars.
Sailor Moon doesn't just save the world, oh no...she saves your outfit too babes.

And yeah, I know magic can be labelled as dark and mysterious, so sometimes you need to dress the park in sheer tops, high polos mixed with denim, purple lips and sultry CKs 
(pigtail plaits, optional)

If the dark side ever gets too much though, just throw in a polka dot top with a playful fox into the mix of your matching dark berry skirt and lip.
Or don your jumper that has fluffy sleeves that makes you feel like a sassy show-pony (because who doesn't want to be one of those?!) and then you can talk all your worries away on your Simpsons phone case. 
You know your main man Mr. Smithers is always on call for you. 

Because slogan sweatshirts are for all occasions - whether you're protesting against the shit show of the state the political landscape is in. Or, you jus want to tell everyone that you're a lazy pup and basically going to be mentally out of office until winter is over now.
Because life's too short not to say - or wear - what you feel. Life should be multi-coloured and faceted.

Whether that's a rainbow pastel covered coat of fluff (who has £700 for me to bring this coat of dreams home eh? anyone?)...
...or dying your hair into a My Little Pony dreamy curly and colourful dream.

Because the end of the day, fashion is meant to be fun, and if it ever seems like it's not, then just slip into your stripy pjs, have a sleep and start again in the morning.
No biggie. Don't sweat it babes.


Until next time...
A.x

Sunday 4 December 2016

Month by Numbers: fireworks & festivities

7 favourites...

1.) Never mind winter is coming Jon Snow, winter is well and truly here. And yes that means i'm shivering to deathwhile waiting for my train (but then immediately boiling when i get on it), but it also means steaming hot drinks, hibernating under blanket and all the autumnal boots, hats and dark lipsticks that you could wish for.

2.) One of my favourite nights of the year is Bonfire Night. It's just an everning to feel all snuggled up and always feels like  the start of the festive season with the cold air, massive scarves and mulled wine. And this year, I made my way up north to Manchester and was huddled around the bonfire with some of my favourite girls, drinking mulled wine and 'ooh-ing' and 'ahh-ing' at al lthe pretty bonfires. We spent the whole weekend basically doing nothing nad it was bliss. We chatted the world to rights on everythng from ironing and feminism, to fluffy jumpers and our hopes and dreams, all while sipping on Baileys hot chocolate covered in a mountain of marshmallows. YUM.

3.) Someone came into my life as if it was a British romcom from the 90s starring Hugh Grant. We met on the tube (I KNOW) and things were ticking along. I knew he wasn't for life, but he was nice enough and our time spent together was fun enough for, well, now. I'm an eternal optimist and forever want to see the best in people and give them the benefit of the doubt. But sadly, this came person proved me and my glass-half-full nature wrong and came out of it as soon as they came in. I can forgive busy schedules, I can forgive you not a fan of my emojis, but i can't forgive rude-ness. Nop. Boy, BYE.



4.) There are few things in life that I love more than food and carbs in particular. So when Bella Italia asked me if I wanted to taste their new menu and also learn to cook some of the dishes and how to make fresh pasta myself, I was there quicker than Wilde E.Coyote trying to catch Road Runner. I rolled out dough, tossed some pasta and ate so much delicious Italian food, puddings and wine that I almost needed to be rolled home.

5.) What better way to get into the festive spirit than ice skating outside the tower of London! but of course, because it's England, it's never long until it rains and ruins all the fun. But fear not, when the ice rink turns into a slippery hazard, there's an ice bar and a tour of the Tower to indulge in. Learning abotu the Tower of London made me feel like I was on a school and also like I know nothing about the city I live in as I soaked up and was equally creeped out and fascinated by all the history. 

6.) I went to a few screenings this month which including the magical Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them and the fabulous E! series on Mariah Carey. But a big tick in my book for very different reasons, but the fact that at the Mariah screening there were diva-appropriate pink cocktails and a gold glittery photobooth that had a wind machine kinda was just like being in a diva playground.
7.) Jack Garratt is some kind of musical genius. Him, drums, a sound baord and some back up singers and it was was of the most engaging gigs I've been to. And the best thing is despite absolutely killing it on the scene, he's still got so much genuine excitment, creativity and adorable disbelief that he gets to do what he gets to do as living, and I think we can all afford to be a bit more Jack Garratt in our jobs.

5 tweets...
1.) In an attempt to drown my sorrows, I went to the vending machine & it dished out 2 of my selected treat. World's not COMPLETELY broken then
2.) Reading stories w/my nephew this moring & he stopped to say 'Amy, I'm having fun with you!' HEART. MELTED.💓
3.) When you see a photo of young Trump & have the awful realisation that your ex looks like him 😳 (key word here being EX 🙈)
4.) I'm singing Colours of the Wind at the top of my lungs while dancing around my room in my underwear....what about you? 🍂
5.) "The pièce de résistance was the hash brown" - an actual thing I said. (And I meant it. It was a pork belly & hash brown quesillda guys!)

3 songs....
1.)  Sexual - Neiked ft.Dyo

Not to get TMI but this song is as it suggests, a lil bit sexual. ALSO, how does she hit those high notes? Believe me, I've tried in the shower, and I can tell you it does NOT sound the same.

2.) Pour some sugar on me - Def Leppard


For some reason I was a bit obsessed with this song when I was about 15 and although I'm not sure why, my god do I applaud teenage me. It makes me want to do knee slides on a bar countertop in a Coyote Ugly style, and whips my hair into a backcombed mess.

3.) After the afterparty - Charli XCX

This is kinda a bit Gwen Stefani - Hollaback Girl, as in you can imagine it being played at some prom and everyone chanting along with it. And I enjoy that bubblegum pop goodness immensely.

Until next time,
A.x

Sunday 20 November 2016

October pink & pizazz

October means winter is well and truly here, and well, with early nights and darker mornings, that means darker clothes. But before you feel too glum, remember that the festive season is also on it's way! So glitz up your gladrags with gold-stitched shorts, skirts and belts.

Or just, y'know, go the whole hog. If MC Hammer wore playsuits, this is SO what he would be rockin'
Perfect for a night of drinking and dancing, but sadly I will never learn that money and calories seem to still count on the weekend (sigh)

Yep. Sadly a baller at the weekends, and just plain ol' skint throughout the rest of the week. At least spend my weekend wearing sassy thigh highs and a swishy Lakers dress, trying to be a different kind of baller.

And even when the daily grind of your skint life gets to you, you know you can brighten it up with multicoloured scarves and skirts!

And of course, with October comes Halloween. And yes, you could just rock a dark lip to work while rockin' your high ponytail like it's 1990

But why do that why you can go full-blown Ursula, complete with seashell necklace, white hair and  iridescent cheeks worthy of a underwater witch.
 (FYI, the coloured hair spray was loads of fun to wash out the next morning while accompanied by a hangover.) 

But why does the dressing up and fun have to be restricted just to Halloween?! If you need me, I'll be wearing ALL the jazzy accessories from crystal tiaras and fluffy scarves to shimmering butterfly heels.

But at the end of the day, surprise, surprise! This girl loves a bit of pink - whether it's in the form of spots...

...stripes....

...or teamed with sportswear (Baby and Sport Spice, UNITE!)

Heck, I've even got a pink coat that makes me feel like Detective Barbie!

What can I say? I'm just born to be a lil pink piggy.

Until next time!
A.x

Saturday 19 November 2016

Month by Numbers: N64, night moves & namaste

7 favourites...

1.) October has basically been intervals os being jam-packed busy with plans, and then being a lazy coach potato. One day i might get the perfect balance instead of going from one extreme to another, but for now, this is what my life looks like.

2.) What better way to spend get over the hump in the middle of the week than go bake the biggest cake you ever did see, and being taught to do so by a past Bake-Off winner. It felt my ateries clogging up with diabetes as I was making the chocolate and sweets covered doubled up monster, but my-god was it worth it. Drinking bubbly and icing chocolate fingers on a cake with your buddy. What a great British evening eh!


3.) For my birthday, my flatmates got this yoga-loving bear a trip to do yoga while overlooking the city of London at the top of the Shard. So at the crack of dawn, I headed out into a crisp and quiet central London and my god, the early morning was more than worth it. I spent an hour just contemplating the big ol' city while stretching every limb. I left feeling refreshed and relaxed - just the R&R this bear needed in the midst of the London hubbub.


4.) Growing up with 2 older brothers meant I was a bit of a game freak. You might not of guessed what with the fluffy lilac bag and sparkly skirts, but throw a Nintendo controller my way and i'm a happy bunny. So a bar where you can play arcade and videos games - old and new - until your heart's content? I'm running there quicker than a a blue shell flying through Mario Kart. And with such a fab place, it was hardly surprising that it was busy and filled to the brim with people having a ball. So when it came to time for me and my friend Thea wanting to play some old school N64, we made some gaming buddies. They scoffed with pity as they offered me the character of Princess Peach and picked 50cc for our benefit. Cue me whopping their asses on Mario Kart and Thea thrashing them on SNES Street Fighter. If that isn't girl power, well, then I don't know what is.


5.) And now onto night out of a completely different calibre. For my gorgeous friend Chez's birthday. I went for the nicest pre-drinks of sushi and Prosecco (come a long way since the days of Apple Sourz and Dominoes!) before heading to Piano Works which was THE most fun! With a live piano band taking centre stage, there's no set list, the crowd hopped up on tequila shots and beer request all the songs and they just kill it each and every single time. Form Outkast and Gangsta's Paradise to All About That Bass and Spice Girls and everyone is just having a ball.

6.) Having a couple of days of holiday left to use up at work, I used up some for a long weekend to go back home for some peace and quiet from the city life. Life and work and all that's in between is so damn tiring - being an adult is tough y'all! So sometimes you just need to go back to your hometown, to your parents and just sleep, be fed and spend afternoons chasing your nephew from a field of pumpkins. Feel like a new woman after that long weekend! That is, until I got back to London and hopped on the tube...


7.) I love a theme so it's unsurprising that I love Halloween. Our house was covered in cobwebs, we were splattering blood (fake, of course) all over my flatmate's wedding dress ("Zombie bride? An ex-wife" - name that film!) After going my fave babe Ariel fora friend's birthday before, i've been desperate to go as Ursula for Halloween and finally did it. There was purple in my face, white in my hair and gin in my tummy. Which I'm pretty sure is why I felt like a poor unfortunate soul the next morning...

5 tweets...
1.) Life as the youngest person in the office: my editor just asked me if I new what a jukebox was 😂👧🏻
2.) Sat here with my carrots and hummus before sacking that in and cutting myself a fuck-off massive slice of cake 🍰
3.) People need to go on more 'mate-dates' cus @delphinechui & I went from social media buddies to IRL friends 👊🏼 #LevelUp 
4.) Just had Diet Coke moment: Hot moving guy came into our female filled office. Tried to be cool, strut by. Fell into a door intstead..
5.) Haven't seen my aunt for a while and she just said 'have you said thank you to your mum & dad for making you so beautiful?...WHAT?!? 😂

3 songs...
1.) I am a fully-fledged feminist through and through so when H&M released this bomb-dope ad showing what it REALLY means to be a lady, i was all on board. Being a lady doesn’t just mean swanning around mansions and swishing their dresses in fields. They also get on the tube and love to chow down on meals.  Oh, and that babe that is Lion Babe’s cover of a Tom Jones classic encompasses this perfectly. 

2.) Little Mix are one of the only and best girl bands around at the moment. Watching them perform and sing sassy lil’ songs as a something makes me feel the same kind of girl power that  I felt when I was throwing peace signs to Spice Girls in my bedroom. And when it comes to break-up songs, there’s the ones that you just want to sob to as you drown in your bottle of wine, but after that, you need something feisty and this is that. When you need to say to your ex, ‘yeah it’s nice what we had and yeah i was sad for a bit, but i’m so much better than ok now so cheers for that.’


3.) This is just one of those songs that make you want to ditch just plain ol’ walking all together and stut like you own the place. I find a new one of these songs ever so often, but sadly my grounds for strutting around is just the the northern line on the London underground, which usually is accompanied with mice , At lease this song makes it feel more glam than that eh? 

Sunday 16 October 2016

Sugar sweet September

September had a trip to Ibiza stored so once again, it was time to do some packing (which I always go overboard with...standard)
And what does one pack for the party island of Spain? 
Well crop tops and hot pants ahoy first of all, surely.

Secondly, anything with a palm tree or tropical print is going STRAIGHT in my suitcase
Oh and no holiday's compete without your watermelon bikini of course, otherwise water-melon-choly time away that would be am I right?
But it's sad times when you come back from holiday and go back to work. That means no more crop tops and tropical kimonos on a daily basis. Not really office appropriate is it? No. Didn't think so. 
But fear not, you can carry on the khaki colour theme of your summer tropical forest with a slinky chained crop top to go with your ripped high waisted jeans. Feel weirdly like I'm in Liberty X and I weirdly don't hate that...
And even if you have got a bit of holiday blues, don't fight it, show it via your outfits. Blue skirts, blue bombers, blue camis - blue e'rything y'all.
What can I say? I just can't enough of the khaki - and I've even upped the anti and pimped out my camo coat with some pretty pins.
You can put the girly girl into an army jacket, and she'll find some way to make it more girly with sassy pin badges and floral embroidered jeans. 
And if flowery jeans weren't jazzy enough, you can mermaid your way through Monday like a shimmering mermaid with your sparkly pleated skirt. Toughened up with a Biggie Smalls tee, naturally.
When the sparkles get to much, be safe in the knowledge that you can always slide them off in favour for your trusty dungas - available in blue and blue - and perfect with a sheer, pastel top.

Dungas are all fun and games hwen you're pint-sized a la me. Can we just start naming heights in a more exciting way please? Instead of 5ft 5, you can just call me fun-sized. Like a mini Milky Way Celebration if you will.
 Wrapping myself in a lilac and white strappy mini dress with white heels that Cupid has given it's stamp of approval of with a glittery pink heart and arrow - who knew Daisy Duck could be such a style inspiration eh?

Until next time...
A.x