11 things I get way too excited about now I'm an adult

I never thought I'd see the day that I get a sense of pride and relief over getting all of my ironing done, but sadly, the reality of that day has come everybody.

Yeah sure, hearing the twinkly tones of an ice-cream van and making it to a bar just in time for happy hour are still things that make my absolute day, but coming home to fresh bedding and fresh flowers are also now things in my life that make my heart flutter.

And that, my friends, is because with every day, I'm becoming more and more of an adult and apparently I get kicks from the tiny, silly things in life.

1.) Getting a new glasses prescription

Yes - you need to get your eyes tested where your opticians gets uncomfortably close in your personal space. Yes - you'll have to fork out for essentially some magnifying glasses. But my god, all of a sudden, you'll be seeing the world in HD vision. Well, until the next time your eyesight declines again.

2.) Bounding into a freshly made bed

If you're anything like me, you still won't know the best of most efficient way of putting your bedsheets onto your duvet but wrestling with your bedding will most definitely be worth it when you snuggle up at the end of the day and it feels like a warm marshmallow that smells like spring. 

3.) Enough to feed a small army

Gone are the days of dry pasta with whatever veg and sauce you had in your fridge. Cooking in bulk is now the norm, because as well having a banging dinner, you also want to have a lunch at work that's NOT a Pret sandwich, as well as a back-up meal in the freezer for when you work late and get home with no energy to even make a meal, nevermind whip up something a la Nigella.

4.) Fresh Flowers

Like Sweet Female Attitude once said: "I'll bring you flowers, in the pouring rain". A little pang of joy sets off in my heart whenever I'm cutting fresh flowers and have a variety of vases out ready to arrange them all in. They get dotted around the house and every time I walk past one of them, that pang of joy returns. I don't think more than 3 days have gone by without there being fresh flowers in my room, which is world away from when I smashed the pot of plastic flowers at uni.

5.) Tetris kitchen
There's just something about doing a big ol' food shop and having your fridge so well stocked that you have to slot everything in so it fits oh-so-perfectly. Content at it's finest.

6.) Pinterest as fuck

Yes I do have multiple pillows and cushions on my bed now, and some of them are (dare I say it) just for aesthetic purposes. Also, making my bed is the first thing I do now when I roll out of it, well, while the kettle's boiling for tea because who can even function before caffeine eh? YOU TELL ME WHO. I just want my space to look on point so when I see it, I know at least one small componant of my life to not be a mess.

7.)Clean & serene

Once upon a time there was a floordrobe living in my room 90% of the time. But oh how those times have changed - now if coats aren't hung up and clothes aren't folded away, I just can't sleep easy. 16-year-old Amy? You better believe it.

8.) Going green

I have a potted plants of different herbs on my windowsill ok. Not only do they look cute but boy, do that pack a punchful of flavour to my meals. It's all about being functional kiddos.

9.) Stuff in jars

You can take your packaging and recycle those bad boys because I, my friend, have got multiple containers, jars and bottles to decanter all your sauces, your pastas and your oats into. You want thingamabobs? I've got plenty of 'em.

10.) Fold it up
I'll hold my hands up and admit that I've spent more than one Friday night in going through my pile of laungry, ironing it, and folding it into one neat and concise pile. And for a gal that used to hate ironing so much that she ended up eating food on her ironing board instead of actually, y'know, ironing on it - I'd say this was a pretty big turnaround don't you?

11.) Walkies?

They're not just for your four-legged furry friends! Honestly, can you beat a long ol' walk to...NOWHERE of a Sunday afternoon with your rabble of a family or friends? After stuffing yoruself with a massive Sunday roast that is of course. No destination to get to. No time period to finish by. Just wandering aimlessly in the outdoors. Music to my ears that.

And you know what? Even though most of the time you feel like you haven't got a clue what's going on and just like a big kid in disguise just winging it as and adult, it's these little things that make you realise that actually, you've kinda got it down kiddo.

Until next time,

A.x

"Are you asian? Cus I'm Chin-a get on you!"

You won't believe some of the things I've had shouted, catcalled, yelled and just thrown in my face before.

"Your legs look tasty, just like a pair of golden spring rolls!"
"Do you want to come home with me and practise some Kung Fu moves in bed?"
"Yee-haw cowgirl! Where are you trotting off to today my love?"

"Would you like a taste of my sweet and sour chicken balls?"

"They don't make them like you back in Thailand!"

(Yep, sadly, all of them have happened...)

Some of them have been just plain racist. Some have been pure sexual and gross. Most of them inaccurate. Many of them just don't make any sense.
But all of them, are not ok!

This is not me bragging about getting attention - I'm perfectly happy and confident in myself, but on the other hand, I'm also not a leggy Victoria Secrets angel strutting down the street, you know what I mean? I'm just going about my day y'all.

This is me just sick of this happening. And the worst thing is, when you talk about it, there are those people who just DON'T get it and will no doubt say 'Oh, but they're just trying paying you a compliment! It's nice! Stop being such a whiny cow about it!'

It's almost like if you're a female, and you take the courage to speak out about something you feel uncomfortable about, you're labelled a mardy, feminist, bitch.

First of all, comments like that aren't a compliment! 

You have nice eyes, I really like how passionate you are about your career, that bag is amazing ,  you're make me proper LOL, I really like spending time with you - THOSE are compliments!

Second of all, these are strangers. I don't know you from Adam mate - what do you expect to happen when you shout comments like that to people? That they'll think 'my god, that's what I've always wanted to hear! Please let's go on a date so I can hear more and we can talk about how we're going to spend our lives together' No. Nop. Big bag of nop. Not gonna happen now is it?

If you were with your girlfriend, sister, daughter or female friend and someone shouted something like that to them down the street, you wouldn't be OK with it would you?
But you see, the thing is, you'd never see that happening because sadly, it only happens really happens when they're not with any guys or if you're alone. Cowards. 

Instances like this, I like to stand up for myself. I like to tell people that, 'Dya know what? I don't feel ok with that and it made me a bit uncomfortable' and hope that they maybe even realise why and think twice about doing it in the future. 

But it's sad when you end up have to pick and choose which battles you're gonna stick up for yourself, because you simply don't have the energy to tackle them all.

I've honestly been too intimidated to walk past a bunch of lads shouting stuff at me before, so have crossed the road or gone a different way. That's what it comes down to.

And there is no reason on earth I, or any other girl or person, should ever have to feel like that.

So, can we just not please?

Until next time,

A.x

The Good of being Sad

As I type this, I'm trying to catch my breath as a sniffling hot mess, with tears rolling down my face.

I'm upset. And that's ok.

Ask anyone, and they'll say I'm a pretty happy-go-lucky and optimistic person. Imagine a kangaroo in Disneyland - that's me. 

I've also know and constantly remind myself how fortunate I am and my life is. I've got a roof over my head, friends and family who support me emotionally and financially, and more clothes than a 6-year-old's Barbie doll.

But sometimes you just feel down in life, and being and staying upbeat when you're not feeling like that, can take it's toll. 

To be honest, I don't think January Blues are helping either.

My dad isn't one to always show his emotions or when he's upset, and growing up, if I were to shed a tear or two, I would instantly be told to stop it, or asked what on earth I was crying about. And to be fair, I am an absolute sucker when it comes to soppy heartfelt movies and I wasn't very good at being in control of my emotions when I was a hormonal teenager with a long-distance boyfriend.
But I'm quite the opposite to my dad- if I think you're great, you'll receive limitless hugs to show it, and you don't even want to see the state I get in when I watch the first 15 minutes of 'Up'.

Having my head screwed on a bit more now though, tears are a rarer occasion, but dear lord, these past couple of days they've crept up on me, and today, I've just burst out into tears for no logical reason.
And I've come to realized that that's fine. 

If you're feeling shit, then dear god, let yourself feel shit.

Showing emotions doesn't mean you're weak, it means you care. And crying doesn't mean you've failed, it means you're human.

(WARNING: going to get all philosophical and soppy on your asses)

Life is a fucking weird, wonderful and bumpy ride with a endless spectrum of emotions. So with the hysterical laughter fits, there's gotta be some sob fests in there too, otherwise how would you appreciate the amazing-ness of all the good bits?

There's not really a purpose to this post. I'm not writing this so that people can pity me, but I'm writing it because sometimes a good ol' cry can do you the world of good, and you shouldn't be ashamed of it. And people should know that and not be ashamed of it.

But my god I'm not going to wallow in it. I've stopped off at the sobbing station and have sat down there for a coffee, but I'm not renting out a B&B for a week there. After I've finished my coffee, I'm putting on my kicks - yes I said kicks - and continuing on my run into the sunset. 

(What on earth is this analogy I've come up with).

Let those tears flow, have a cup of tea, or a G&T or two, and then fix up and carry on as the sparkly, fantastic person that you are.

Stay happy! - or not, stay whatever you're goddamn feeling.
Until next time,
A.x

Sheffield: 100% Me

I always think of Sheffield as my 2nd hometown. And I only lived there for 1 year of my life.

And I think that's because when I moved to Sheffield. That's when I really became, me.

I like to think I'm a pretty outgoing person who's assured of who I am, and this isn't to say that I wasn't myself up until that point, I definitely was and have never to pretend I was anything else but me. But I just think, I didn't fully let out that every single 100% of me, just in case people didn't like it. So I kept a bit of that madness bottled up in a sparkly jar.

I've lived in the same place I grew up in all up until the point I left home and went to Uni.

When I left for Uni, I was absolutely terrified and scared as hell. My friends and family were all I knew, and the thought of not being around the same people that I'd been around for all my life, everyday as I had done, frankly scared the flower embroidered socks off of me.

I ended up depending and finding security in my boyfriend at the time, when I moved to Uni. He was familiar and comforting, and a person and an emotion that I knew. And to be honest, I didn't fully immerse myself in the whole uni life and experience in that time, because I was trying to hold on to THAT part of my life so much. Like a child who won't get off the swings.

Then when we broke up, I kind of did the same with my flatmates. I'd grown to know that and them, and they ended up being my new security blanket I guess.

So when I moved to Sheffield for my postgrad, it was all completely brand-spanking new. I was moving to a new city where I didn't know anyone. There was no-one I was emotionally attached to that I could depend on, and I was going to be moving into a flat with a bunch of strangers. 

And just like a kid who's scared of the 1st day of school, at 21 years old, I was getting ready for my 1st day, and worried I wasn't going to make any friends and have to eat lunch on my own everyday for a year, and hide in my room away from my flat full of people who didn't want to watch Friends with me. The horror.
I even took a ribbon bow out of my hair before I left the flat because I thought no-one would want to go talk to THAT girl.

A year later, it turns out that some people flipping love that girl.

Who'd have thunk it?

I ended up with a whole new bunch of friends who I know will be for life, lived with a bunch of people that went from going to weekly pub quizzes together, to chats until 2am in our kitchen, and met my kindred spirit of a best friend within the first 2 days.

I danced ridiculously at clubs. I let the cackle come out of my life.  I talked to people more honestly. And I was more honest with myself. There were some emotionally hiccups along the way, but by golly Miss.Molly, did they make me be more honest with myself when it came to my feelings when I came out the other side of the tunnel - if you're going to mess me around, then I sure as hell don't want to be around for you to mess with.

And when I watched Lousie from Sprinkle of Glitter talk about what Liverpool means to her, it's exactly the same.

When I think back at what I was like when I moved to Sheffield, to what I was like when I left, I wouldn't say I changed, but I just let more of myself come through. I came into 100% of myself.

And as my bestie said when I told her how much I love and miss Sheffield because of these reasons, she said:
"I think that city was just so suited to your personality, that you just shone."

I couldn't agree with her more.

Sheffield. I love you, you bonkers Northern beauty.
And you'll always have a special place in this equally as bonkers girl's heart.

Stay happy!

Until next time...

A.x

The Five.

You know how each one of us is attracted to certain qualities in a person? Qualities that make our heart flutter and fancy the pants off them?

And I'm not talking about having blonde hair and blue eyes.

No, stuff that's much more deeper and meanigful than that.

I've wanted to make a post like this ever since I watched Will Darbyshire's video, where he writes a letter to his future wife. I'm not really a video person, and more a writing type of gal, but I decided to give it a shot. But after attempting a video, complete with horrendous bloopers, I couldn't put across what I wanted to say down in words, and it ended up seeming as superficial as I tried to avoid it from being.

That was until I read a post on the Man Repeller, about the top 5 criteria.

This is a list of 5 criteria that are most important to you when it comes to someone you mgiht approach into a relationship with. And as she puts it, it's important to be specific and positive, rather an negative. Because no-one wants an unkind, mean, stupid and horrible partner.

It's about stuff that really matters. Not just listing the thing physical attributes of your teenage heartthrrob that you plastered posters of around your room.

So, without further ado, here's mine...

1.) Love their food.

I love my food. Like, you will find me talking about how amazing food is, whilst I'm eating amazing food. Food and I have had a bit of a rollercoaster relationship, after having a rather chubby exterior while growing up. But I love the healthy stuff as much as the naughty stuff (and it's just as delicious most of the time!), whether it's cooking or dining out, food is more than just something to keep me alive. And I love so many different aspects of it - a world of traditional British grub, sophisticated sushi and endless mountains of pasta, wouldn't be enough! Dinner and good food is a big part of my family as well. It brings us together - whether through happiness or sadness. So dining out on McDonalds every night just isn't gonna cut it soz.

2.) Be Passionate.

About something. Anything.  I've been out with people who don't really have an opinion on anything. And it starts getting a bit tiresome trying to drag out some interest for a conversation. Anime, cooking, 1950s detective movies - anything! Have something that you love, not only for yourself, but then I don't feel as bad when I spend hours going on and on about why Elie Saab is the designer to make all girl's princess dreams come true. And just be passionate about it! 

(As well as being passionate in some other aspects in a relationship too...)

3.) Family-mad

I'm a proper family girl. Nothing fills my heart with as much joy as when my whole family gets together. I'd want you to get involved when my brothers challenge a duel on MarioKart, or my dad wants to share a tipple of cognac. And I'd want to feel like part of your family too. I've been in relationships where this has happened before, and it become so much more meaningful and homely.
The same goes with friends. As the Spice Girls once so poignantly said, 'if you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends'. Truth girls, truth.

4.) Not scared of intimacy or their feelings

Not necessarily proclaiming your love via a poem on MSN (yes, this has actually happened to me...), but also, I don't want to be guessing or trying to suss out how you feel about me or what you think about us. I've been in the situation before where I spend every second worrying and analysing, and it's not fun I can tell you..

5.) A big kid at heart

This doesn't mean immature. They're 2 completely different things. I care and work hard at my career and life, but also, I'm a massively young at heart. I'm a big believer in work hard, play hard, and when it comes to playtime, anything goes. I've been in a relationship where all fun and ridiculous ideas were thrown out of the windows and it made me feel like an idiot who needed to grow up. Surely being with someone where you can't fully be yourself, can't be healthy. So, please don't completely write it off when I suggest we go hunting for all the Paddington bear sculptures with marmalade sandwiches in our hands. When I get excited about a night out where there's a bouncy castle and a dance machine, I'd love it if you already had your Pac-man socks on ready to bounce (this is an actual event I've been to. It was amazing. Obviously).

One of the best present I've ever received is a box filled with Haribo heart sweets.

People say they don't know where all the single people are anymore, and I just think, 'Look around! They're everywhere!'

Could it be that people are so used to seeking and talking via the screens that they stare out, that they don't know how to talk to people in person anymore?

So go on - go talk to that person you've been looking at all night, and if there's a spark there, be nice & go for it! 

What have you got to lose?!

But most of well, just be yourself and don't worry!

 Things will happen when they're meant to.

Stay happy!

Until next time...

A.x